Being Stalked And Feeling Trapped
Like most bloggers I had a personal Facebook and another one for my blog. It’s not that I don’t want to involve my followers in my life! I do! But since this is my job, I need to have some control and privacy. I’ve made a vow to myself that my family and close friends would never be bothered just because my job is online.
Headphones on while I gaze a steampunk drawing, I’m in love with the concept, the music is perfect, I’m feeling inspired. A deep beep coming from my pocket dissolves the magic. It’s my Facebook, again. Ugh, I’m getting sick of so many notifications. Who is this person even?? My inspiration disappears as I browse my feed. I swipe and go to the settings panel.
I feel my blood running cold. This is not my cellphone number.
I change the number, change the password and log out of all devices. WTF was this, I think. How did this happen??
In the same instant I receive an email from…me? This is all really weird. “STOP. STEP BACK.”
This is how this nightmare began. Me and my little sister began to receive texts from an anonymous number. First, he went from just hello, then to threatening us and calling us every name in the book. He started chasing us, if we were on McDonnalds for instance, he would text us “McDonnalds”. We were never alone, let alone just the two of us. He took our privacy, our freedom and our energy.
We would spend days and nights trying to connect this to anyone we could possibly know. Police was being no help, as he was using lots and lots of software and it all was directed to me.
I took a break from blogging, she took a break from social media (that still lasts to this day), and we both waited this would eventually stop, but it didn’t. We secretly hoped and wished it was just a hacker, but it wasn’t.
“I’m never going to leave. You’ll be the perfect submissive. I’ll always be in your head.”
Some of the threats he would make us would talk about rape others just about hurting us, the police was very much alert at this point in time.
My phones rings, it’s one of my best friends. “Babe, did you set up a profile on Fetlife?” “Urm…on Fetlife? Nop. Why?” “There’s a profile with your name in it…and your picture…”
FetLife and Fake Profiles
FetLife is just like Facebook but for people who are into BDSM. Let me just say that if you’re thinking about 50 Shades of Grey, believe me, it’s nothing like it. FetLife has the most extreme (and soft) BDSM you’ll ever find. Also, there’s some pretty extreme pictures and videos. You know, to which their own.
She did a fake profile to do a study and all my lucky stars aligned because she found the profile with my name on it. It had a few friends, a few people whom he followed but messages are completely secret, so no why I was going to find out who was him taking to. So it was pretty clear what we had to do: we needed to hack into the account to delete it and prevent more damage.
Again, this escalated really quickly, he sent people to my Instagram (probably to harass me?) but people were very polite and understood exactly what was going on. His plan failed miserably. He also tried to arrange a few meetings in a motel with some people but of course, no-one would show up.
I made a post on Instagram (you can click here to read it) and people from all over the world were using their expertise to find profiles, IP addresses, locations, etc. We were finally able to enter the account and delete it.
We don’t know how many profiles are up at this point, whether it is on FetLife, Facebook or any other place honestly.
It’s been 3 days with no text messages and just dealing with collateral damage from those fake profiles he did. It’s been quiet, it has been peaceful, but until when?
Hey guys, like I promised on Instagram here’s a little bit of an explanation about the stalker. Sorry this is so resumed but otherwise the post would be too big. I will do another one just with some tips on how to prevent stuff like this to happen to you another time. For now, I just want to thank everyone for the support, the love, and the positive vibes you’ve sent me. Both me and my little sister, as well as my family and friends are really thankful for people like you in the world. I hope that this saga ends up here, but I’ll keep you guys updated. Make sure you follow me on instagram (@ellaivoire) to read it on my stories.
For those asking me on Snapchat when will I resume my vloggy style on Snapchat/Instagram, I’m taking a break from it, just for the sake of my mental health. I need a little bit of privacy right now and will return to it as soon as I feel able to. I know you’ll understand.
I’m not sure how this post will come across so I just want to be perfectly clear that this hasn’t happened because of the blog and that BDSM isn’t related to this. FetLife is just one of the sites that he has used along with a bunch of others. Really friends, I’m fine with whatever floats your boat, as long as it is consensual.
I just wanted to ask you once again to keep your eyes peeled for any profile that isn’t mine (I’m @ellaivoire everywhere and I have no more profiles!). Thanks guys!
A especially big hug to Stephan, Marie and Pierre for helping me track the profiles!
LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH!